(soft music) (distant clattering) Está muy lleno de polvo.

(woman) Ever since I can remember, we've had this Tree of Life sculpture in our house.

Un arbol de la vida.

♪ Mom and Dad brought it from Mexico on their first trip back after not being able to travel when they were undocumented.

♪ It's been sitting on the mantle in the living room for 30 years.

Árbol de la vida.

Sí, ese.

Sí.

Pero usted lo quiere llevar Mom wants to know if I want to keep it when they move back to Mexico.

Ya está.

Con lo que se está crumbling.

-It's crumbling?

-A little bit.

♪ (woman) I only have a few more days before they leave Texas for good.

(speaking Spanish) ♪ I hate that our little family is gonna be separated across borders.

♪ (object clatters) ♪ I grew up afraid Mom and Dad would be taken away from us.

Now that they're safe, they're the ones who have chosen to leave.

♪ Are we allowed to feel abandoned by our parents?

♪ I'm kind of angry about it, actually.

♪ (tape rewinding) (static whirs) Instead of packing up, I'm digging up the past.

(Mom) ♪ Twinkle, twinkle, little star ♪ (woman) From 1996 to about 2002, they filmed a lot.

(jittery vocalizations) (laughing) They bought the camera at this really interesting time in their lives.

They were going to have their second baby.

They were moving from the city to the suburbs.

They were buying a house.

(children singing) They had just become American citizens.

(children) ♪ Almighty state ♪ Texas (woman) They were just really excited about everything... And so, they filmed everything.

(indistinct chatter) In these tapes, there was a perfect balance.

The sacrifice of leaving family was bearing fruit.

The risk of living in fear in the U.S.

while being undocumented had paid off.

They were on a mission to make happy memories.

(mellow music) ♪ Mom and Dad don't really talk about the past very much.

♪ They crossed the border in the '80s.

Back then, it was easy to get a day pass and just stay.

(indistinct chatter) They quickly picked up agriculture work like millions of other migrants.

By a stroke of sheer luck, Reagan pushed through a naturalization process for agriculture workers, including our parents.

Once they got their green cards, they could travel back home.

(indistinct chatter) ♪ (singing in Spanish) ♪ But by then, you and I weren't socialized around our Mexican family.

We were too American, too awkward.

Through the years, those divides have never gone away, and so, we remained our little four-person unit, isolated in our own little cultural island.

-All the way, one more.

-One more, one more!

(blows air) (birds chirping) (Ricky) This is the only house I've ever lived in pretty much my whole life.

Really, I can't imagine living anywhere else, 'cause I haven't done that.

(panting) So, it's kinda weird kinda getting used to that fact, that I guess I won't be living here soon.

I mean, for the majority of my life, them being here is like... they've been like a rock, emotionally like a foundation.

(woman) Thank you for calling Student Health.

This is Riley.

How can I help you?

Hello.

So, I'm, um-- I'm a rec-- I recently got accepted into a graduate program at Texas Tech.

Well, the thing is, I'm on medication, so I'm wondering kind of what is the process for the transfer of services?

-(phone rings) -Mom, I'm on a call.

Mom, I'm on a call!

I am guaranteed housing, right?

(man) Right now, I do not believe so.

Es que no lo preparamos para el ambiente a quien no hubo.

Aquí en la casa era feliz, pero a lo mejor fuera no era feliz por por su manera de ser.

Ahí fue la desconexión (speaking in Spanish) Y ahí sí no lo pudimos proteger (pan sizzling) -We'll be fine.

-Okay?

Sí, es un poco.

(Ricky) You're in League City?

I'm really glad Kevin's my friend.

I'm almost astonished that he wanted to be my friend in the first place.

We're thinking about going to Cidercade, you know where that is?

I guess he's taught me a lot about being resilient.

He learned how to be fun and not serious because, like, the alternative is, like, going crazy.

Happiness at all costs, I think.

(videogame gunfire) When I was really young, I would say elementary through high school, I had trouble making friends.

(videogame sounds) And I just came off as, like, weird to most people and couldn't really explain what I was thinking or feeling and all that stuff.

(videogame sounds) I think everyone was shitting on me for putting on a bad party last time.

(laughing) (Kevin) I remember that!

(Ricky) And then so, as an excuse, I started pointing to my autism, and so I started posting this, and I said, "You're legally required to forgive me."

Hay ya un ciclo.

Un ciclo se cierra, otro se abre.

No me arrepiento para nada.

Haberme venido para acá.

Paloma y Ricky tienen mejor futuro aquí que en México.

O eso es lo que valió la pena Claro que sí.

Sacrificamos cosas.

¿No?

Yo estoy entusiasmado por el paso que dimos.

Todo muy, muy, muy, muy, muy feliz.

No sé, no sé tú.

♪ No sé tú?

♪ Yah, si!

Yeah.

(Paloma) I've been watching over you my whole life.

When I had the camera, I'd be filming you.

I mean, the tapes are all of us filming you.

You were our kid.

What are you thinking about as you pack up the house?

(Ricky) I mean, having--having my mental breakdowns there, being depressed there.

(indistinct speaking) I had good times there.

I had terrible times in there.

(banging) It's like, terrible things happened, great things happened.

But that's like any house.

If you live in it long enough, I guess.

The happiness of knowing that they're doing what they want will completely probably overshadow me missing them, if that makes sense.

(windshield wipers thudding) Because, like, I mean, I just know how much they sacrificed for me, and I guess I don't want them to do that anymore.

(somber music) ♪ (Paloma) I really thought Mom and Dad would live in this country forever.

♪ (Martha) Hi.

(Paloma) I guess I didn't realize that they needed to get away.

(Martha) Say something.

(Paloma) How long had that been brewing, that unhappiness with living here in the U.S., in Texas, after fighting so hard to stay?

(horn blowing) ♪ It used to feel like there were millions of people like Mom and Dad.

We used to live among them in Houston.

♪ But the air has shifted now.

♪ In these tapes, I return to a place where their story is still possible.

♪ Holding onto us in these tapes feels like a way of keeping that version of America alive.

(Ricky) What's your favorite color?

My favorite color is blue.

♪ What I am mourning is the sense of pride... ♪ ...that Mom and Dad used to have about living in this country.

♪ It feels like they're taking all of that optimism with them.

♪ They're leaving, but we have to stay.

♪ And home can't just be where they are anymore, and I don't think you and I have figured out what that is yet.

♪ ♪ ♪ (bright music)